As a stay at home mom that had never really planned on being a stay at home mom, there are a few aspects of my life that my husband will just never understand. Even if I tell him over and over again, he just doesn’t get it. I’m going to write this up and then after it’s released, we will wait for him to read it and then on Monday, I will give you all of his responses to each number! We’re going to have some fun with all of this! Okay, here we go…
- I don’t ever get a break. There isn’t a time in my day where I can just leave and go off for ten hours to the office and leave someone else with the kids. That’s my job. Then, when normal business hours are over, nope I’m still here. Making dinner. Feeding kids. Changing kids. Changing clothes. Washing clothes. Wiping up spills. Cleaning up food off the floor. Getting kids to bed. Praying no one wakes up long enough for me to empty the dishwasher and mop the floors. My days never end. It’s what I do 24/7.
- I can’t just turn my ‘mom brain’ off. When I actually do get away, I’m going to talk about the kids. I’m going to think about the kids. I’m going to worry about what’s going on with the kids. Men have this ability, it’s like out of sight out of mind. They can just shut part of their brain down and focus solely on what they want. I don’t have that ability. When I’m somewhere (even if I just run to the store) I check my rearview mirror twenty thousand times in order to check on the kids. I look around to do head counts even though I know they aren’t with me. It isn’t something I can just stop doing.
- Somedays I just need some empathy. When I mention that I’ve had a tough day, I really don’t want to have to sit and listen to you complain about what’s going on around me when you’ve been home for fifteen minutes. Realistically, the complaining usually starts when he’s been home for two hours. Yeah, I haven’t been doing that and ten times more for the last ten hours by myself. I really had no idea that it was frustrating when someone doesn’t want their diaper changed. Did I mention that someone threw up all of their lunch all over me today? I may have mentioned that. (Brody really did throw up all over me yesterday) 🙂
- I have a certain way that things get done. I don’t usually complain when he helps out. But my oh my, sometimes when he does help it just creates more work for me. When you’re at home all day, you get a routine. So when I run to the store in the morning and get home and the house is in utter chaos, I just want to scream. He definitely doesn’t understand me getting worked up about being off routine or schedule. This one sometimes I need to understand that it’s just because I’m used to doing it every day. Others, I think I’m creating excuses. Usually by eight in the morning the babies are changed out of their PJs, they’re fed, and we’re ready to start our day. When I come into the room at eight am and he’s sleeping on the couch, I wonder if he thinks I do that every day. Which brings us to our last point.
- I don’t get to sit around or nap all day. When he gets home from work, I understand that he’s tired. I am also exhausted. I don’t think he will ever understand that point. Just because I don’t leave the house in the morning and head to a nine to five anymore, doesn’t mean that I’m not working. I am the first to admit, I work harder now then I ever did at my old job. Just don’t tell my old boss that! Haha. I don’t nap even if the kids are napping. On the off chance that all three kids are sleeping at the same time, I run around like a fool trying to get more done around the house! So yes, I can understand that he went to work and are tired but I am equally if not more tired than him. I just want him to realize that I am not sitting around eating bonbons all day. If anyone wants to send me some bonbons I would be happy to squeeze eating those into my busy schedule! 😀
I hope everyone has a happy Friday and a great weekend! Bryan is racing tonight so hopefully we won’t rain out and he can finally get some laps in!
Honey, you are not alone. Bryan is not alone. Being a mom is the hardest job out ther and yet the most rewarding! I think all men think why isn’t this or that done. They just don’t realize a mother’s/ wifes way of thinking. You want the house cleaned, the kids cleaned and happy and dinner on the table so that you can spend an evening doing something fun! Let him do it to your standards just once…. he will get it. Hang in there…. it gets better unfortunately when they are older. Just like you appreciate how he goes out to provide for you and your family however, he should appreciate what
You do for him and your family!!
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You are so right! I had him read this before I sent it out and I think there was a little glimmer of a lightbulb haha
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